i almost lost it this morning. i go into the employee's lounge to brew myself a cup of green tea.. there was already someone in there.. who? the one lady in the building who absolutely repulses me. she's a lazy, trashy, inconsiderate witch. okay, so i act as though she's not here.. like i always do when she's in my presence. hah. the witch quickly finishes the scraps on her plate.. as i'm standing there waiting for my tea, in my peripheral view, i see her trying to open the dishwasher.. but it was latched shut because i ran the thing last night before i left. even though i never use the provided utensils and what not, out of COMMON courtesy.. i'll run it if i see that it's full, and unload it if i see that it's done. she unlatches the door, looks.. quickly shuts it.. and places her dirty dish and fork in the sink.

o..m..g..

it wouldn't have necessarily bothered me this much if it had been someone else. why? because crap like this has happened before. one time, at a department potluck.. there was some potato h'orderve.. i kid you not.. i watched her break off about 3/4 of the last one on the plate.. and she left that quarter piece to avoid having to walk the damn thing to the sink that sits a few feet away.. who does that??!! anyway back to the incident that occurred earlier today.. she immediately sprints out the door.. and i stood there in utter disbelief. i mean, i know she's a lazy, no good moron.. but hello? i'm standing right there and it takes you FIVE gotdamn minutes to unload it.. she has NO class.. none whatsoever. it took all my will power and strength to refrain from snatching her by her nappy hair and throwing her scrawny ass into the dishwasher. three deep breaths, and i quietly unloaded everything and walked off with my cup of green tea.. ho hum..

people like her.. *shakes fist*

you know what else irks me? when everyone in the right lane.. at a light, has their right blinker on.. and then there's the very first car who.. ruins it for everyone else as he's the only one who's going straight. does that make sense? okay. and also.. i am so sick of going into my gym and half the cardio equipment doesn't work. additionally, they removed all the magazines.. with the fees and dues that they charge us members.. they need to get on it.. pronto.

let's all have a ranting session, shall we?

i watched dr. phil last week.. two consecutive episodes. i don't normally view this show because i've never been too fond of that man. but on these two occasions there was a couple who came on to save their marriage. the husband.. i forgot his name so we'll refer to him as "bob" and the wife.. "barb".. bob and barb, har har. moving on.. bob wrote to dr. phil seeking his help. bob has obsessive compulsive disorder -- like a severe case of it. he is beyond obsessed with his wife, barb. let me recap some of the extremities he's gone to.

bob has.. (some are quite disturbing)

• put gps tracking devices in barb's car.
• recorded her phone conversations.
• shut off her alarm so that she couldn't go to work.
• pretended to be a flower delivery boy so he could get access to her desk.. the only "safe" place for her to store personal items (documents, etc)..
• threatened her coworkers, family, friends, etc.. so now most of them won't even talk to her.
• cranked up the heat while she slept so he could watch her strip.
• faked a vasectomy. he cut himself to make it look like he got this procedure done so that she would have sex with him. he hoped he could get her pregnant again because "it's saved their marriage before"..
• paid teenage boys to follow her and report back to him their findings.
• stuck a camera in her tanning bed to take nude photos of her.
• imprisoned barb.
• blocked myspace.com from all the computers in the house, except his laptop.. there she has to keep her password saved so he can have access to her account.

these are just a few i can remember.. they have three children together. she was 19 and he was 30 when they tied the knot. bob has caught barb cheating on him before.

he's determined to catch her again.

it's crazy.. some of the boundaries people will cross..

i know to many there really is no excuse for her to stay.. but he has trapped her financially.. she doesn't have a job anymore due to his actions.. he's let his business turn to complete shits so that there would be income available for the children to attend daycare.. (she says he is a good father, i beg to differ).. eeek, what a mess.. what a mess..

I PASSED MY EXAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i am ecstatic..

i found this in my outlook.. thought i'd share it with you lovely folks..

"hollywood in 2037".. brace yourselves..

  
"i ain't no holla back girl".. hah.

not like he looks any better these days. hah.  

this is so realistic. i wish whoever did this could do me, too. (wait.. that didn't sound right.. but you get what i'm saying.. eh).. this just shows you that appearance shouldn't matter (as much).. looks come and go, my friends.

and i didn't get abducted by aliens. none of that freaky deaky nonsense occurred last night.. thankfully. the only logical explanation i could come up with (thanks to many of you).. is that there was a mini earthquake that wasn't reported.. yeah, that's it.. (i hope)..

i still haven't recovered from last night.

what happened you ask..

i crawl into bed a little after midnight.. i'm sure i passed out not five minutes later. next thing i know, i'm awoken by a loud bang. my eyes zapped open. the neon, red numbers read 12:54.. i couldn't help but analyze the sound.. it was almost like a gun shot.. anyway, i disregarded it as i was beginning to doze off when all of a sudden.. my bed started to vibrate. the whole effing bed was shaking.. i spread my body out making contact with the wall because i wanted to be certain that i was not imagining this. not ten seconds later, my glasses fell off the night stand that sits next to me. i froze in shock. i smothered myself with my blanket as my heart is beating profusely.. an hour or so later, i passed out.

i arrived to work this morning and quickly made my way to my computer. i googled every local news station/paper. before opening these sites, i'm praying their front headlines will read that we had a mini earthquake earlier today. nada.. NONE OF THEM. any explanations as to what caused my bed to shake, my glasses to hit the floor, the loud banging noise????

i'm a little scared to go home tonight.. i'm staying over at your place. thanks.

goliath.

 
i <3 him.                                                                  cousins.

     
lucious and napoleon.

(they have more clothes than i do).. if any of you ever need custom made doggy clothes, let me know.. or go here.. that's lucious on the pagefront. he's a model. haha.

this is my third entry today.*bows*

i have two more hours to kill.. (had cereal for dinner so i must stay up to fully digest it).. 

ho hum..

so rosie o'donnell is leaving "the view".. although i've deemed her as a controversy-craving,
loud-mouthed, obnoxious, manly orangutan, she's brought high ratings
for abc with this whole controversy with donald trump and what not.
she's raised many eyebrows..
however, i commend the idiot for defending herself and speaking out
against the cradle-robbing donald and his hair (which is a separate
entity in and of itself)..

i was reading two articles on msn.com.. "why i wouldn't date him" and "why i dumped her"..

i'm curious to know..

what is your absolute deal breaker?

gah. i failed.. what really sucks is that i was so damn close. four sections.. i passed three of them with flying colors.. and the last one.. two friggin points off.. i keep trying to recall all the questions in that particular part but nothing's forming..  luckily, i only have to retake the one section that i failed.. 

that test environment is extremely nervewrecking.. especially with all those cameras glued to your every move. they should at least hide 'em from our view. anyway, i'll be going back on friday, hopefully.. cross your fingers for me.. please? =]

on a lighter another note..

i'm in love..

"j" went and purchased him this morning trying to give me motivation to pass the test.. heh.

he looks like a "goliath".. what do you think?

i was halfway through my bowl of kashi heart to heart cereal that was soaked in a cup soy milk.. when i began to feel a weird sensation in my mouth. i paused. all of a sudden i could feel my bottom lip throbbing.. it felt as though there were numerous cuts on the inner part of the lip.. an insatiable itch proceeded -- on the roof of my mouth, my lips, my tongue.. the only other time that something like this has happened was when i inhaled a mango years ago.. which i soon realized i was allergic to. my coworker noticed what was happening and asked if i was having a difficult time breathing. this got me all paranoid because she started going on about how my throat could close up from an allergic reaction. anyway.. five minutes later and i was fine. it just perplexes me as this is the brand of cereal i usually eat.. and i'm always drinking soy milk.. hmmm.. (i did purchase a different brand of soy milk.. but they're all made up of the same ingredients, no?).. oh, the excitements.  

anyway, enjoy these amazing photos. i wish i knew the source but these were sent to me in an e-mail fron a coworker.

so the lady who stood me up on saturday.. mary -- the one who was supposed to purchase the merchandise i had listed on craigslist.. texted me yesterday. quick recap.. i drove over forty miles to meet this woman wanting to meet her halfway, thinking it was only fair.. after numerous attempts to reach her that night.. i finally gave up realizing that she was not coming. on my way home, i left her a somewhat friendly voicemail stating that i would have appreciated a phone call to inform me of her change of mind.. i went on about how gas isn't cheap and that my whole saturday was scheduled around this meetup.. i wanted her to feel some remorse. okay, back to the text.. it read something along the lines of.. "angie, i'm really sorry. my father had a heart attack and is now on life support. i i truly didn't mean any disrespect".. after reading this i'm thinking.. wtf.. that's pretty low. why would someone stoop to this level and make up something so awful? whatever. i deleted it and that was that. i receive a phone call from mary later that day.. i refrained from picking up and yelling at her. she had left a voicemail so i quickly dialed 1 2 3 send.

"hi angie, this is mary. i texted you earlier but wasn't sure if you got it or not. i wanted to call to apologize about yesterday. my father had a stroke and i had to leave work early to be with him.. our meetup was the last thing on my mind at that point. my phone was turned off because they didn't allow it in the icu. listen, i know you don't know me but i am not that kind of person to stand someone up like that. right now, my father is on life support which i'm keeping high hopes about. when this is all over with, i'd like to buy the stuff from you and, of course i will drive to you. but if not, that's fine. i apologize again. bye."

i felt like a complete jerk. wow.. i assumed she was yet another flake.. i was wrong..

i don't know if i should call her back though.. i do want to get rid of the items.. but at the same time, i feel guilty..

as kids, we seek to be accepted by our peers.. to fit in with the rest of them.. and then there comes a point where you realize you're different. you possess these contrastive traits -- mainly, in a physical sense because well.. that's just what kids notice. for me, i grew up in an all white town.. hicksville as one may call it.. i always knew i wasn't exactly like the rest of my classmates.. but it was just something all of us disregarded. it didn't really matter at that time.. we were only first, second.. third graders.. the only awkward moments for me were when the teacher placed me in the back of the line. we'd march in a synchronized manner into a room.. ah, it was that time of the year. combed hair, sunday shirts.. it was picture day. i was always last. shortest to tallest, i even beat out the boys.

and then i "graduated" from primary school.. and off to middle school i went.. with the big kids. it was frightening.. but exciting at the same time. hell, i was ecstatic knowing i would be surrounded by fifth, sixth, and seventh graders.. and.. gasps.. maybe.. just maybe i could even be friends with them. the next thing i knew, reality stabbed me in the neck. i noticed that there was something really peculiar about me.. omitting this bit of self discovery, i went on with my jolly good ol' self. then, one day.. on my way home from school, this pair of seventh graders sat down in front of me. the boy launched directly at me.. "why are your eyes like that?" it was as if i was being condemned. confused, and completely caught off guard.. my eyes began to well up with tears.. "haha, ching chong chong chong!!" he squawked while stretching out the both of his eyes.. for the first time in my life, i was ashamed of who i was.. and well, it didn't end there.. throughout these school years -- the years that i had once looked forward to.. i was tormented and teased.. as one of the very few asian kids (i was also the youngest) at that school, i was the butt of all their jokes. it was always.. "hey, let's pick on the chink".. damn those bullies.

oh, the joys.

then, as i got older.. my race rarely played a factor into my life.. socially, academically, nada.. we got out of hicksville and relocated to a city overflowing with asians.. it was quite the culture shock.. transitioning from a town which consisted of about five asian families to one where they made up a good chunk of its population.

and then the issue amongst my peers became my braces.. the thick glasses i was forced to wear. it went from being called.. a "chink" to.. "four eyes".. "metal mouth".. never did it end..

to this day, it hasn't. why? because i am now my own bully.. which is, hands down.. the worst of them all.

i need to take a break.. i'm surrounded by massive books and various notepads smothered with illegible handwriting. three uncapped highlighters (or is it hi-liters?), two pencils (one mechanic, one wooden), three pens (blue, black, red).. scattered everywhere.. as an aching hand with ink markings in random areas begs me to stop.. my head is about to explode.. i have horrible short term memory on top of everything else. superb.

will someone please.. enlighten me..? a story, a joke.. hell, insult me for all i care.. anything helps at this point..

i'll give you a cookie?